fading fast

i'll delete him from my queue
because he looks like you.

i'll ignore the refrigerator
humming the song "alligator".

i'll sit and cry, yearning
to be out there and not stationary, burning.

i'll gag and spit you out,
i don't give a damn who i talk about.

you tell me sharp,
"i'm fading fast, tianna,
fading fast."

it's your own damn fault or is it mine?
for not talking to me all those years.
didn't try to convince me i was wrong,
not even that you were right. were you?
your silence was a lesson well learned. i never know what to say.


because i can't be around you anymore
without hating what's to come,
molestation, unwanted marriage,
302, ogling, basement yelling.
i wonder where our family even started.

but the majority of me is too angry to care.