i still need you. i always will.
i can't remember what it's like to wake up with you, and that saddens me more than anything.
but competing for the sadness is how i forget just what your voice sounds like.
and i forget your smell.
i forget your touch, your clammy fingers.
but i know your taste, your arms.
i know your hand in mine, embarrassed sometimes, public love.
how paranoid i got when you didn't tell me.
how worried i got when you did.
how much i want to tell someone, anyone, how much i care for you.
how much i tried not to.
how much i can't see the screen through my feelings.
how much i'd like to collapse in your arms when it's rough.
how it hurts that i can't.
how i don't know how much you like me because you never told me.
how it hurts.
how it hurts.
