sophomore

I’ve felt so unlike a writer recently. Wondering if it’s the right life choice for me and everything. I’ve wanted to be an author since I was in elementary school, but then I decided it was more practical to aspire to become an editor or a publisher. Apparently that’s still not very logical, but it’s just that I’m not good at anything else. I really like proofreading and giving people feedback and if that’s not what earns me money, then… I guess I just won’t be rich and that’s all there is to it. I have no regrets so far about being an English major; I just want to be the best at it that I can be. And not slack off or anything like that. If I can accomplish that then I think I’ll be happy with myself. Even though I’ll be paying off college loans for the rest of my life. But isn’t that what so many other people do? I won’t be put off from education because of a ~dark looming future~.

I’m realizing that this reflects my philosophy on pretty much everything. “That’s just the way it is.” I’m very simple in that way. I didn’t really enjoy my sociology classes for that reason – I like learning about current events and issues, but I don’t like thinking about them too much or asking why. It’s just that things will be the way things will be and we have to accept them as they are. I don’t know if that’s a particularly positive way of thinking and I’m sure I’m not making any sense, but… YOLO.

Yep. I just went there.

I’m going to be starting my sophomore year of college in a couple days and I can’t believe I just typed that. I’ve written so many online blog posts about starting the first day of a school year in a couple days and it’s just mind blowing that time goes by so quickly like that. I feel like I really haven’t even accomplished very much.